Renaissance report

It appears that mega-store developers have their eyes on the historic 19th-century factory buildings in Eagle Square (this is where Atwells, Valley and Harris avenues meet at the base of Federal Hill). They'd like to tear them down to build a retail strip development.

Well, you know where P&J stand on this. Not only are the buildings in Eagle Square (including Uncas Manufacturing, Crawford Seed and Valley Worsted Mills) beautiful, but they lend credibility to the highly touted Providence Renaissance by housing a great number of artists. According to Edward Sanderson of the Rhode Island Historical Preservation and Heritage Commission, "the buildings at Eagle Square are very likely candidates for listing on the National Register of Historic Places, which would make them eligible for historic preservation tax credits."

The restoration and preservation of these kinds of industrial buildings is essential. Just look at Downcity, where the vision of creating a residential neighborhood remains unfulfilled. Some believe the first wave of residents will be humans willing and able to pay big bucks for high-priced apartment and loft units. Maybe these people will emerge, but it certainly will not be a community of artists. With the exception of the affordable space at AS220 (God bless AS220), the vast majority of working artists have instead clustered around places like Eagle Square for many years.

This is the reality. As the Downcity concept inches forward, there's no reason to believe that it will become economically feasible for lots of working artists to move there. If you need further proof, look at the Big Nazo studio, which, for many years, has been above the Providence Performing Arts Center. Now, PPAC is renovating the space for another use, and Nazo, despite attempts to do so, has been unable to find an adequate and affordable space in Downcity. There's a possibility that Big Nazo, a group of artists, performers and puppeteers with international renown, might have to move out of town. If Big Nazo finds it difficult to maintain a downtown space, what do you think the chances are for newer and less well-known artists?

Now, a coalition of preservationists (the Providence Preservation Society), industrial mill advocates (Providence Industrial Mill Buildings Association), and artist groups (Providence Artists United), are asking the Providence City Council for a three-month moratorium on the demolition of the Eagle Square buildings. This group wants to discuss two very different visions for this area: a lively and unique entrepreneurial community of artists, musicians, craftspeople who, if given the opportunity, can turn this into a colorful and popular (and financially successful) urban destination, or just another bunch of predictable retail stores. As we said at the beginning of this piece, you know where P&J stand.

Black eye

Nice work by the folks at Providence College, who joined the likes of the University of Wisconsin and the University of Idaho in pretending they have black students who aren't just jocks.

PC's use of a black janitor in a photo to show politically correct "diversity" is an embarrassment. The fact that the only black face the photographer could find on the campus, on the day he was shooting promo photos for a PC brochure, tells the whole story. And it was very interesting to learn that the mere six percent of minority students who actually are enrolled at the school are so frequently trotted out as tokens that they've started refusing to take part in this type of charade.

It's one thing to try to actually have a diverse campus -- although living under the biased rules of PC's Dominican order of overseers is no day at the beach, as those who promote a woman's rights to abortion found out last year -- but it's disgusting for an institute of higher learning (honk!) to be this cynical. And what a wonderful time for the story to break, just as Brown has made history and headlines by naming a black woman, Ruth Simmons, as its president.

A suggestion from P&J: perhaps the school should just use police photos of some of the players on the PC basketball team, as there seem to be plenty of those available.

Political science

A rather exciting week at Casa D., although J. was not amused on the morning after the election by having to cut P. down from the curtain rod, where the rascal attempted to hang himself with a silk Armani tie.

So, we were treated to an election in which we selected candidates who were brain dead, as well as just plain dead. The former, of course, is Dubya Bush, the wholly-owned subsidiary of Big Oil, to which he evidently paid tribute by going to the polls dressed like an oil delivery man, with a jacket that looked like he had his name embroidered over his heart. Probably so the little doofus wouldn't forget his name when asked. As the saying goes, the Republicans' idea of diversity is having two people from different oil companies on the ticket.

And the interred corpse of Missouri governor Mel Carnahan turned a neat trick: instead of stiffs in the cemetery voting on Election Day, there were real voters casting ballots for someone who was six feet under. How much therapy do you think opponent John Ashcroft is going to need after being beaten by a dead person? A stiff was deemed to have more charisma and leadership qualities. Hide the cutting knives and razor blades at the Ashcroft household, please.

P&J have put Holly and the Italians' underground classic, "Tell That Girl to Shut Up" on the jukebox in honor of Florida Secretary of State Katherine Harris and Dubya' spokeswoman Karen Hughes. Christ, what a pair of sour, bossy shrews. They must have entered politics after successful careers as dominatrixes. Harris has decided that she alone is the law in her backwater state, while Hughes is hanging around in Texas with Junior and Big Time, way out on the ranch in Crawford, regaling us with updates on the Big Oil Boys' spirit-lifting discussions about such hilarious matters as executions. Nothing like someone going to the chair to perk up a Republican.

Meanwhile, these two harridans are countered by the Gore spokespickle, Warren Christopher, who looks like someone who needs to be escorted to the bathroom, since he has forgotten where it is since his last trip. He's matched by Dubya's personal Daddy figure, James Baker, who appears to be so loaded on Librium that it takes him a full minute to complete a sentence. If these two were intended to lend the famed gravitas to the discussions, they should have been brought in about four years ago, because, baby, it's time for the shawl and hot water bag for these two burnt-out, busted-up circus dog politicos.

And don't count on this being over soon. A Florida friend of P&J's has been going down to her old Palm Beach County stomping grounds on the weekends to take part in the protests. She describes the situation as volatile, with the Bush supporters being the most rabid in wanting this bogus ballot to slip through. One Gore supporter even fainted at a confrontational stage -- exactly what we feel like doing every time Harris, Hughes, Christopher, or Baker step up to a microphone.

Cold consolation

As the long count continues, we agree with the pundits about one thing: whomever wins, loses. We noticed a poll, bandied about on NBC News on Tuesday evening, as to whom the public blames for bad stalemate behavior, and it came out 47 percent for Gore, 47 percent for Bush. Split down the middle, just like the election.

This leads us to believe that the eventual victor will be considered bogus by at least half the population. Add to this the almost even numbers in Congress, and this means gridlock for the next couple of years. We suspect it will be Bush who ends up being crowned. The good thing is that his power and authority will be seriously undercut, meaning his massive tax break for the wealthy is probably a non-starter. Also, his anti-environmental initiatives are dead, and getting a raving right-wing lunatic onto the Supreme Court is a questionable proposition at best. This is the good news.

The bad news: we'll be led by another amiable dunce for the next four years. This should at least give Dan Quayle a certain degree of comfort, as we expect Dubya's gaffes will encourage folks to forget about the former vice-president's propensity for goofiness.

Doggy discontent

Another area of post-election concern for P&J, following Dorian's loss to Linc Chafee, is at the Weygand household. Not that we are concerned about Bob and his lovely wife Fran getting by, as before you know it, the Weygand hat will be in the ring of gubernatorial aspirants.

What we want to know is, who's going to support his dog's drug habit in the interim? The next thing you know, we'll be hearing about a rash of break and entries in North Kingstown, with suspicious paw prints left on the safe, or how people are getting mugged in Wickford by a rabid-looking canine who's high on arthritis drugs. Then, it will be on to the Asta Memorial Suite at the Betty Ford Clinic, where Nick and Nora's dog once had to rehab after getting too fond of The Thin Man's martinis back in the 1930s and '40s. What a shame.

Blurred vision statement

So, after all the months of waiting for the state Economic Development Corporation to finally present its "vision" statement for Quonset/Davisville, it turns out that they're still bound and determined to include the container port, whether Vo Dilunduhs want it or not. We figure that Bigfoot has been in a deeper sleep than usual (hibernation, perhaps), because he's obviously dreaming if he thinks his container port will get past the vigilant and energized coalition of environmental experts, North Kingstown officials, legislators and area residents.

More than 300 of these folks materialized for the November 9 unveiling of the draft of the vision statement and, in general, they were pissed. Not only that, but they are well-organized and quite knowledgeable about the issue. Bigfoot and the gang over at EDC tried to pull the old Trojan horse trick, slipping in wording referring to the container port as an option, but, of course, no one in North Kingstown is fooled.

What we don't understand is why the Missing Linc is so intent on having his legacy be the messing up of Narragansett Bay. No doubt his rigid Republican principles tell him that economic development is always good, no matter how conceptually and environmentally dicey. Perhaps Cape Cod is far enough away that he won't notice, and out of sight, out of mind. Lucky for him that the better-organized and wiser forces of North Kingstown will save him from his own uber-capitalist stupidity and make sure the container port is contained.

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