Bitchin' rights

As election days near (primaries on September 12, Big Kahuna on November 7), it's time for P&J's usual screed about getting off your ass and voting.

We find it distressing that less than 14 percent of the state's voters participated in the March primaries, and that 42 percent of the General Assembly races are going uncontested -- especially when such exemplars of high moral standards and good, open government, like Senator "Rubbers" Ruggerio and House Speaker John Harwood, are the ones getting the free rides. As we like to say, you lose your bitching rights when you don't vote. And when only 48 percent of the eligible voters in the US cast ballots in the 1996 presidential campaign, it means not just that relatively few are making the big decision, but that a lot of duplicitous bastards grouse about the status quo while remaining too lazy to visit the local polling station.

(P&J mentioned this figure to a visiting friend from Indonesia, right after 98 percent of eligible voters turned out in 1998 for that country's first free democratic election. He peered at us like we were pulling his leg, and when he found out we weren't, he looked down sadly and shook his head. We thought he was going to cry. So much for Americans championing our basic freedoms of choice and independence.)

Now, a group called the Democracy Compact is raising the same cry, and we're right behind them. The compact has brought together 150 leaders from the business, religious, education, civic and social service communities as "Democracy Fellows" to get people to exercise their right to elect our own leaders. The fellows are set to each recruit 25 "Democracy Captains" who, in turn, will get 20 more people to the polls. The goal is to convince 75,000 new voters to pull the levers in November.

The Democracy Compact already has some estimable hitters on board, with more to come. On Tuesday, August 29, there will be a special kick-off event with the PawSox at McCoy Stadium to launch the Pledge to Vote Campaign and introduce the Democracy Captains. Be there or be square. Hopefully, they'll hand out baseball bats, so you can threaten your friends if they say they aren't going to vote.

For more info and to get involved, call the Democracy Compact at 331-2298, extension 14, and tell them P&J sent you.

Geared up

A little bird tells P&J that Hizzoner, Mayor Buddy "Vincent A." Cianci, may in the near future be the subject of a feature profile in Gear magazine, one of the resplendent rags launched by the family of Penthouse publisher Bob Guccione.

Since P&J usually don't have much time for reading mags after we get done with The New Yorker, Soldier of Fortune, and Blueboy (we like the articles), we had to research Gear on the Web. Here's what we found, along with assorted pictures of cover girls en deshabille:

"Gear magazine is a hip, sexy offering for young men. The latest offering from Gen-X magazine publisher Bob Guccione Jr., the emphasis is on fashion, music, entertainment, interviews and the current scene. This publication seeks the pursuit of the truth and challenges the politically correct with humor and honor."

Well, sounds like the perfect place for the Bud-I -- he's not hip, sexy or young, nor for that matter is he politically correct. But he does have a sense of humor, and many folks think he will be addressing "Your Honor" in the near future. A perfect fit.

Music 101 with Faux Phil

It's always amusing to read "Faux" Phil Terzian, the BeloJo's associate editor, exercises in Democrat-bashing. In the case of the Sunday column of August 20, it was the party's choice of music during the recent national convention in L.A. that rankled our excitable boy. Faux Phil notes that the convention was awash in '70s pop, specifically "American Woman" by the Guess Who, "You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet" by Bachman-Turner Overdrive and John Lennon's "Imagine." He then quoted from the lyrics to prove that rock 'n' roll songs aren't exactly the best vehicles for simplistic campaign sloganeering because, well, they're a little too complicated. Well, duhhh!

In the midst of his big thoughts, Phil apparently realized that he had to at least mention (in passing) that Republicans do the same stupid stuff -- i.e., appropriate popular tunes strictly on the basis of the title or hook. He again proved the sacrosanct nature of Ronald Reagan among conservatives with this line: "To be sure, Republicans aren't immune to the problem: In 1984, some of them mistook Bruce Springsteen's discontented `Born In the USA' for a patriotic tune." No, Phil, it wasn't "some Republicans" who tried to misappropriate "Born In the USA" with a total lack of understanding about what the song was about; it was one certain Republican -- Reagan himself -- who introduced it in a speech in New Jersey.

And who was it that tried to hijack the equally downbeat "Pink Houses" by John Mellencamp, just because the hook went "Now ain't that America, land of the free/Ain't that America, for you and me"? The fact is that most politicians, just like most of the rest of us, don't listen at all to the lyrics. And those who do, well, they best keep their fave songs to themselves. We wonder when Phil is going to quote from some of the lyrics of the Grateful Dead ("Ridin' that train, high on cocaine"), favorite band of Republicans John Kasich and William Weld. We won't be holding our breath waiting.

The simple fact is that much of post-'50s pop music has too many mixed meanings, and strictly personal resonance, to be used as anthems for any political campaign, Republican or Democrat. But that won't stop politicians from thinking about tomorrow. They'll continue to strip-mine rock 'n' roll for their own purposes, much in the same way that sneaker and car companies do.

Oops!

Last week, we made a mistake while announcing the September 28 roast of your superior correspondents at Rhodes-on-the-Pawtuxet, which will celebrate 20 years of this here cool, cool world and benefit the Fund for Community Progress. We actually gave the fund's old telephone number. So, if you want to see and hear honorary chair Jack Reed, emcee Bob "Lonnie Love" Kerr of the Urinal, Mayor Buddy "Vincent A." Cianci, AG Sheldon Whitehouse, JARhead Jim Taricani, Judge Rogeriee Thompson and the woman who should be governor, Myrth "Peppermint Patty" York, turn the tables on P&J, call the fund at 941-7100 for tickets and info. Be there or be really square.

Third eye

Kudos to our old pal and JARhead cameraman, Tim O'Donnell, for his great shots of loony Robert Recchia attempting to run down US Representative Bob Weygand, Johnston Mayor William Macera, his neighbors and members of the media. The group had gone to investigate the foul odors emanating from buried construction debris on Recchia's property, which has been driving his neighbors to flee their condos. This odor problem also drew a $174,000 fine from the state Department of Environmental Management.

Shades of Rachel Ritchie: O'Donnell kept the videotape rolling as Recchia drove up to the visitors menacingly in his SUV, screaming at them to get off his property. He then returned for another run at the group, which included his yelling out the window, "I'll kill you!"

While the antics cost Recchia an arrest for disorderly conduct and reckless driving, we'll be looking forward to his defense when O'Donnell's Channel 10 footage is screened in court -- and isn't threatening to kill a member of Congress a federal crime?

Mudbath 2000

While the only true suspense at the Democratic and Republican national conventions came from discerning which delegate would humiliate him/herself with the most hideous hat, we here in the Biggest Little are blessed by the campaigns for the US Senate and Second Congressional District. Isn't it strange how "Little Richit" Licht can make an assault ad seem boring by injecting his somnambulistic voice? Dorian Weygand, on the other hand, seems truly stung by Richit's early assault and came out with a new spot this week that goes way over the top in accusing Licht of personally "creating" a scam state job for a "crony."

Meanwhile, Jimmy Courage seems to think that every time Kate the Red attacks on an issue, it's a personal affront. Not that Kate didn't fumble a bit with her two-candidate poll question. McAllister and Taveras will just have to sit and stew since they don't have the resources to join in on the TV fun. It would be really nice if the voters can cut through the entertaining charges and counter-charges, and zero in on the issues, because there are some definite differences among these candidates. Can anyone say "reproductive rights?"

The horsey set

After channel-surfing the other evening, P&J found ourselves locked in on an equestrian event on ESPN, just to see the poncy equestrian horsey set in a thrilling (yawn) show-jumping competition. But we always did love a man in jodhpurs.

What was most interesting was the name of two of the top five riders in the event. One was named Leslie Howard, which led Jorge to leap off the sofa shrieking, "Ashley Wilkes rides again!" much to P's delight. But the roof was raised by cheers when we saw his toughest competitor take center stage. The well-heeled gent's name? Rich Fellers.

You're in your element, son.

Adios

P&J pass on our condolences to the family of Don Abood, a friend and journalist, who recently succumbed to cancer. A regular at some of our favorite watering holes in Providence and Jamestown, Don had a long local career in print and pictorial journalism, from the Urinal to Prov Biz News to his last job as editor of the Barrington Times. Too quickly, too soon.

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