BY CLIF GARBODEN

THURSDAY 17

12:10 (12) Basketball. First-round NCAA tournament action. (Until 5 p.m.)

7:00 (12) Basketball. More first-round NCAA tournament action. (Until midnight.)

8:00 (44) Viewer Favorites. The redefinition of "Nothing’s on tonight!" continues under the guise of showing you the special fundraising concerts and infomercials you liked best. Except none of them was much good. Ah well, another excuse for us to venture into the world of pseudo-surrealist imaginary TV. (If public TV keeps on fundraising, before long, Americans will be spending more hours in front of their pseudo-surrealist imaginations than they now spend reading TV Guide.) As you may recall, Becca the Winsome Blonde and the slightly nerdish Rodney have just been reunited in love at the annual Bayport–West Creu hurling-championship match. But as they lingered over their kielbassa subs, they didn’t notice the pale figure of Becca’s friend Li’le Bran-Bran lurking in the shadows. Continued at the next Viewer Favorites listing. (Until 11 p.m.)

9:00 (2) Viewer Favorites. "No," sobbed Li’le Bran-Bran into her colorful bandana. "It is I who deserve the love of the slightly nerdish Rodney. How shall I face Becca?" Continued on Saturday at 11 a.m. (Until 11 p.m.)

FRIDAY 18

12:10 (12) Basketball. Still more first-round NCAA tournament action. (Until 5 p.m.)

4:00 (44) Great Performances: Eric Clapton’s Crossroads Guitar Festival. Repeated from last week. Clapton invited a bunch of blues musicians he wanted to jam with to the Cotton Bowl in Dallas — and they all showed up. A sweltering show featuring Robert Cray, Vince Gill, Buddy Guy, Hubert Sumlin, John Mayer, Carlos Santana, James Taylor, Jimmie Vaughan, Joe Walsh, and ZZ Top. (Until 6 p.m.)

7:00 (12) Basketball. Finally, the end of first-round NCAA tournament action. (Until midnight.)

8:00 (44) My Music: The ’60s Experience. Repeated from last week. The difficult-to-explain side of the 1960s with old performance clips and remakes of Procol Harum’s "A Whiter Shade of Pale," Janis Joplin’s "Piece of My Heart," and Hendrix’s "Purple Haze." The roster of performers includes Roger McGuinn (the Byrds), Eric Burdon (the Animals), Chuck Negron (Three Dog Night), and John Kay (Steppenwolf). To be repeated tonight at 1 a.m. on Channel 2. (Until 10:30 p.m.)

10:30 (44) My Music: Funky Soul Superstars. Repeated from last week. Patti LaBelle, Isaac Hayes, and Vivica A. Fox host fellow FSSs. Hayes does the Shaft theme (accompanied by comments from Richard Roundtree himself); Cuba Gooding Sr. resurrects the original Main Ingredient for "Everybody Plays the Fool"; and original Stylistic Russell Thomkins Jr. sings high and tight on "You Are Everything." (Until 12:30 a.m.)

SATURDAY 19

11:00 a.m. (2) Viewer Favorites. Y’know, making up funny television story lines to fill space in this column is fun, but we’re actually beginning to tire of it. We hope you still find our efforts amusing. But mostly we hope that public TV gets back in gear and starts showing interesting programs again. Sigh. Li’le Bran-Bran sighed and was verging on tears just as Becca the Winsome Blonde caught a glimpse of her in the corner of her eye. Continued at noon. (Until midnight.)

Noon (44) Viewer Favorites. "B-B! Hey, c’mon over," squealed Becca. "Look who I found! It’s Rodney!" "Swell," retorted Li’le Bran-Bran without much enthusiasm. Just then, the vague rumbling that had been building off to the left swelled to a roar as hordes of hurling hooligans rampaged toward Becca, Bran-Bran, and Rodney. "Look out!" yelled the always alert (if slightly nerdish) Rodney. To be continued on Sunday at 10:30 a.m. (Until midnight.)

1:00 (12) Basketball. Non-stop second-round NCAA tournament action. (Until 10 p.m.)

7:00 (6) The Ten Commandments (movie). "Moses, Moses, Moses!" Must be coming on Easter. ABC’s relentless faith that people will sit through an entire evening of Cecil B. DeMille’s Biblical epic 49 years after it was made is touching. Of course, the term "relentless" can be applied, well . . . relentlessly . . . to this film of films. Charlton Heston plays Moses (and doubles as the voice of the Almighty). Plus, we get classic performances by Yul Brynner, Edward G. Robinson, Anne Baxter, Yvonne De Carlo, Debra Paget, Nina Foch, Vincent Price, John Carradine, and oh so many more. Not to give too much away, but for the benefit of those whose bedtimes interfere with watching the whole movie, in the end, the Jews get home from Egypt. (Until 11:44 p.m.)

Midnight (2) Wayne Dyer: The Power of Intention. Does that mean they’ve determined in advance that Wayne won’t be a "Viewer Favorite"? Is this thing rigged or what? And who is this Dyer fellow and just what are his intentions? (Until 4 a.m.)

SUNDAY 20

10:30 a.m. (2) Viewer Favorites. The hurling hooligans, enraged by whatever it is that enrages hurling hooligans, seemed unstoppable. "We’ll be trampled!" predicted Becca the Winsome Blonde in a near-panic. But just then, an even louder roar approached from the right. To be continued at noon. (Until midnight.)

Noon (12) Basketball. More non-stop second-round NCAA tournament action. (Until 7 p.m.)

Noon (44) Viewer Favorites. "Wait! We are saved!" exclaimed the slightly nerdish Rodney as who should arrive but Gilfaethwy the Intrepid But Basically Unpronounceable (whose relationship to these youngsters has yet to be fully explained) in a bright yellow Humvee. "Jump in," invited Gilfaethwy. (Until midnight.)

3:00 (6) Basketball. "Regional NBA coverage." Does that mean the Celtics? Or the Knicks? Or just any game where one of the team comes from east of the Mississippi?

9:00 (12) Spring Break Shark Attack. (movie). TV-movie time. Shannon Lucio sneaks off to Florida for spring break and falls for Riley Smith; then they and their friends get menaced by flotillas of hungry sharks. Combining the current mainstays of TV drama — scantily clad young women, blood, wild teen music, dangerous animals, gross ways to die, fear, and bloodshed. The only thing missing is an autopsy, and who knows? They could work that in. (Until 11 p.m.)

MONDAY 21

1:00 (44) The Last Time I Saw Paris (movie). From 1954. Elizabeth Taylor and Van Johnson star in this story of post-WW2 Paris adapted from F. Scott Key Fitzgerald’s "Babylon Revisited." With Walter Pidgeon, Donna Reed, Eva Gabor, and Roger Moore as a tennis pro. We’ll take this over viewer favorites anytime. (Until 3 p.m.)

3:00 (44) A Walk in the Sun (movie). From 1945 and directed by Lewis Milestone. Dana Andrews and Richard Conte star as members of a Texas infantry platoon taking part in the Allied invasion of Italy during WW2. (Until 6 p.m.)

9:00 (2) Frontline: Who Was Lee Harvey Oswald? We seem to be out of the woods, fundraising wise. Good thing Gilfaethwy showed up in time to rescue the kids. Li’le Bran-Bran’s unrequited longing for the slightly nerdish Rodney will have to remain unresolved for the time being. A complex study of the man hired to murder JFK — or at least take the blame for it. To be repeated tonight at 1 a.m., and on Tuesday at 1 p.m. on Channel 44. (Until midnight.)

9:00 (44) Mystery! The Mrs. Bradley Mysteries: Death at the Opera. Diana Rigg stars as Mrs. Bradley, a 1920s woman who solves mysteries (did women like this ever actually exist?) with the help of her Rolls driver, George. In this, Bradley returns to her finishing school to expose its dark underbelly when a teacher is killed during a student production of The Mikado (which apparently counts as an opera — at least in England). To be repeated on Tuesday at 4 p.m. and then at 2 a.m. on Channel 2, and on Wednesday at 1 p.m. back on Channel 44. (Until 10 p.m.)

10:00 (44) Mystery! The Mrs. Bradley Mysteries: The Rising of the Moon. When someone is slashed to death at the circus, suspicion falls on Castries the Knife Thrower. Diana Rigg, as the murder-investigating Mrs. Bradley, steps in as blame shifts to Archie the Clown. To be repeated on Tuesday at 5 p.m., and then at 3 a.m. on Channel 2, and on Wednesday at 2 p.m. back on Channel 44. (Until 11 p.m.)

TUESDAY 22

8:00 (2) Nova: Dirty Bomb. The show that dares to ask the question "How much worse is a dirty bomb than a clean bomb?" And they actually simulate dirty-bomb attacks in the DC subway system and in London’s Trafalgar Square to get their answers. The show also considers the non-radioactive/non-biological fallout — the social and economic panic — that such a terrorist attack would provoke. To be repeated tonight at 1 a.m. on Channel 44, and at 4 a.m. on Channels 2 and 44, and on Thursday at 1 a.m. on Channel 2. (Until 9 p.m.)

8:00 (44) Globe Trekker. Trekking in Vietnam and Laos. Trekker Zay wades through the rice fields out of Hanoi, tries to catch a goat blindfolded (easier or more difficult depending on who’s wearing the blindfold, we suppose), follows the 1970 War Trail, and meets up with traditional elephant tamers. On into Laos, he catches up with a tribe who like him so much, they prepare him a feast of dog and rat. Fear Factor contestants are made, not born. To be repeated on Wednesday at 5 p.m. (Until 9 p.m.)

9:00 (2) Frontline: Son of Al Qaeda. Abdurahman Khadr was raised to be a terrorist. He even played with Osama bin Laden’s kids growing up. But he later switched sides and became a CIA informant. This documentary follows his career on both sides of the jihad and gives us a look at what it’s like to be part of an al-Qaeda family. (Until 10 p.m.)

9:00 (44) Alan Alda in Scientific American Frontiers: Hidden Motives. Alan Alda peers into the unconscious mind and uncovers what really makes us do the things we do. To be repeated on Wednesday at 4 p.m. (Until 9:30 p.m.)

10:00 (2) Alan Alda in Scientific American Frontiers: The Dark Side of the Universe. Or universes. Look! Up in the sky. There’s lights and stuff. But mostly, when you think about it, there’s a lot of black-looking "not stuff." Alan Alda and some trendy astronomers get super-cosmic as they consider the implications of all the darkness (empty space, dark energy) out there and how our universe may be just one of many. (Until 9:30 p.m.)

WEDNESDAY 23

9:00 (2) The Life and Times of Frida Kahlo. A bio-doc of the famous Mexican painter, who lived a large and flamboyant public life despite illness (polio) and pain (a bone-crushing bus accident). To be repeated tonight at 1 a.m. on Channel 44, and at 4 a.m. on Channels 2 and 44. (Until 10:30 p.m.)

THURSDAY 24

7:00 (12) Basketball. Two of the eight NCAA "Sweet 16" tournament games. (Until midnight.)

7:30 (44) Basic Black: Prostate Cancer: The Enemy Within. A panel of experts discuss prostate cancer, which, thanks to flaws in the health-care system, kills more than twice as many black males as all males. (Until 8 p.m.)

8:00 (2) Kingdom of David: The Saga of the Israelites: By the River of Babylon. The first installment of a four-part series on the creation and growth of Judaism. The story opens in 586 BC, when the Israelites, ragged remains of the tribe of Judah, are being held in exile in Babylon. (Until 9 p.m.)

9:00 (2) Dirty War. An HBO Films drama about a hypothetical "dirty bomb" attack on central London. Followed by a panel discussion of how a similar terrorist attack might play out in an American city. To be repeated tonight at 2 a.m. (Until 11 p.m.)