ALTERNATIVE POLITICS Could Nader seduce Republican voters? BY CHIP BENSON

Ralph Nader makes political people nervous. His acid, expressionless growls on Meet the Press several weeks ago are causing anxiety and performance issues. In the 2000 election, his appeal weakened Democratic support so that the party didn’t deliver all that it was supposed to. Determined Democrats are trying to reset the mood early in the 2004 presidential election, blaming Nader for their past inability to concentrate and stick together behind one candidate. Angry Democrats have been falling in line (sorry, not love) behind John Kerry, and it seems likely there won’t be as many Nader defections this time around. The possible candidate of the Reform Party has told the Democrats and independents inasmuch, to "relax and rejoice" (it’s a Cialis moment), because, it’s the Republican Party that may have performance issues in November.

While certain aspects of the Republican electoral base are fine (evangelicals, military, business), there may be problems upstairs, in the conservative head. Many registered Republicans are not in the mood this time around. It’s been four years, and there are so many issues! Massive deficits, nation-building and the largest increase ever in medical entitlements are a turnoff for true lovers of limited-government. According to Nader spokesman Kevin Zeese, "There is no question we will get more Republican votes this time around." Zeese also cites disaffection for Bush (okay, he said disaffected) among McCain Republicans (for slights in South Carolina), Rockefeller Republicans in New England (over spurned Vermont Senator Jim Jeffords), and Libertarian Republicans (scoldings on drugs and taxes).

The Republicans and Democrats like to say that Ralph Nader is unelectable, and more than just a little unusual. For instance, he has never been married (how can he feel our pain?). Zeese gleefully points out that "half the country is single," and while Nader did break up his last political marriage with the Green Party, he now flirts with the Reform Party. He hopes it is serious.

The Nader camp points out that one-third of all voters in America are registered as independents (swinger, er, swing votes), and that the Bush administration also turns off many in this group. They don’t like his position on civil liberties, corporate welfare — which undermines capitalism — and jobs going overseas. And not for nothing, but there are three million Arab-Americans in the United States (some possibly too scared to vote), but if they do, they really don’t like secret military trials and pro-Israeli policies. Nader is a long shot for sure. For the next eight months, he will try to use his Howard Roark-ish charm to convince independents that the Democratic Party is complicit with the Republicans, but he may attract more Republicans this time around.

Does Ralph Nader have the drive and stamina to attract one-third of the vote, forcing a three-way with the Democrats and Republicans this fall? Better call the Supreme Court and get some Levitra.