We could be heroes

Phillipe and Jorge were quite pleased to see that the legendary Private First Class Jessica Lynch has recovered sufficiently from wounds received in Iraq to be able to go home, but not before receiving the Bronze Star, Purple Heart, and Prisoner of War medals.

According to the Pentagon, after the awards ceremony, Private Lynch rappelled down the side of Walter Reed Army Medical Center, unholstered two Colt .45s, and emptied them into a band of Ninja warriors who were lurking in the bushes outside, ready to kidnap her. She then ran 50 miles to Langley Air Force base, pushing a child out of the way of a speeding bus en route, hot-wired a Black Hawk helicopter and began flying it below radar level back home to West Virginia. On the way, she spotted an Al Qaeda cell along the Appalachian Trail, where they planned to spray paint, "George Bush is a meanie" on historic pine trees. Jessica mowed down the terrorists, believed to include Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein, with a heat-seeking missile. (Identities of the dead terrorists could not be confirmed, the Pentagon said, but a high-ranking military source said two of the bodies "kinda" looked like bin Laden and Hussein, except they were clean-shaven and wearing women’s hiking outfits.)

Jessica finally reached home, where she was met by Nancy Reagan, Jimmy Carter, Gerald Ford, and Bill Clinton, and was promptly named Time magazine’s Person of the Year — the first time the award had ever been announced before the year-end issue. She then taught a Pilgrim Fellowship class at her church and made a country supper for everyone in her hometown. Following the meal, Miramax signed her to a $100 million contract, and she will make her big screen debut in Joltin’ Jessica, Queen of the Desert, due out at Christmas, along with an accompanying action figure.

Welcome home, indeed, Private Lynch.

Instant Web

We love media Web sites. Since the daily print and broadcast media all have them (in fierce competition to break the story first . . . accuracy be damned), they frequently use these sites to toss out hurried drafts that, on occasion, turn out to be less than on the money. Last Tuesday, July 15 (isn’t it always the case that these juicy little tidbits tend to occur mere hours after P&J’s deadlines?), the JAR-heads at the Channel 10 Web site posted this beaut:

Cianci loses appeal, will remain in prison

Government finds Cianci ran criminal enterprise

The federal government on Tuesday denied the appeals of former Providence Mayor Vincent "Buddy" Cianci Jr. and two co-defendants. Cianci was convicted last year of rackeeting conspiracy in the Operation Plunder Dome corruption case and sentenced to 64 months in federal prison. News Channel 10 I-Team reporter Jim Taricani reported that about a month ago, lawyers for Cianci, his former top aide Frank Corrente, and tow company owner Richard Autiello filed appeals with the 1st Circuit Court in Boston claiming their convictions should be thrown out.

In his appeal, Cianci claimed that since he was not convicted on any substantive charge, he could not be convicted, as he was, on RICO conspiracy. The government said Cianci had to know that Corrente was shaking down tow companies for donations to stay on the city’s lucrative tow list.

"The evidence from the seven-week trial established that there were many instances in which Cianci personally participated in the enterprise," the government said in its 200-page response to Cianci’s claim.

In fact, the government filed a brief last Tuesday, challenging the Cianci appeal. There has been no decision and one can’t be expected until, perhaps, next spring. Reply briefs are yet to be filed and oral arguments on the case are not expected until the fall at the earliest.

This particular WJAR posting was up for more than two hours last Tuesday, July 15, before some sharp cookie called the station. By the way, you’ll notice that the mention of ace investigative reporter Jim Taricani is from a past report. He had nothing to do with this foolishness (obviously having to do with someone’s misreading of a BeloJo story that appeared that morning).

Anyway, all we can say is that voracious readers of media Web sites ought to know, far too frequently, that the stuff posted is more in the realm of trial balloons and attempts to trump the competition. The beauty of the Internet is also its bane. You are able to post things with great rapidity. As info-technology becomes more rapidly accessible, this particular element needs to be watched. As Bela Lugosi cautioned in the film anti-classic Glen or Glenda?, "Beware, take care, beware."

Silver screen

P&J’s good friend, Al Gomes of Big Noise, wants you know that this Sunday evening, July 27, AS220’s Indie Film Night will present Jim Wolpaw’s first film, a documentary from 1978, Cobra Snake for a Necktie. Your superior correspondents know plenty about this film, and, while we are undoubtedly biased, we think it’s a pretty darned good chunk of Pro-Town history.

A little history: Jim Wolpaw was a close college pal of Rich Lupo’s, Our Little Towne’s top nightclub impresario. Jim was also an aspiring filmmaker, and in 1978, Rich had made enough loot at his club that he felt he could blow a pile of it on Jim’s film debut, a documentary about Bo Diddley and the Young Adults. Lupo’s faith in Jimmy proved to be well founded. Not only is Cobra Snake a fine film, but Wolpaw went on to direct another film (the subject this time being poetry) that was nominated for an Academy Award.

Anyone interested in the early days of rock ’n’ roll, the legendary Bo, the Providence music scene in the ’70s or even RI’s own cult legends, the Young Adults, should consider this a must-see. It hasn’t been screened in these parts in more than 20 years (it did, however, make the festival circuit and was an early feature on cable’s Showtime).

Also being screened this Sunday will be a number of other pieces of local interest: Big Nazo: Creatures In the Streets, directed by Erminio Pinque, Young Neal & the Vipers Live at Chan’s, directed by Diane Norte, The Home Team Video comedy compilation, a few Carriage House student videos, and more. What’s happening on the local creative scene will be well represented and if you have any interest, you oughta be there. Doors open at 7:15 p.m., films start at 8. For further info, call Al Gomes at (401) 274-4770.

Look, don't touch

In case you somehow missed TV that week, it was time to "cue the Negroes" once again when President Dubya visited Africa recently. Georgie Boy got less than one of every 10 black voters allowed to vote (Thanks, Jeb!) in the 2000 presidential election, so he’s desperately trying to woo the African-American community for 2004. The photo ops showed him sucking up to hordes of young African children, with his escorts, Queen Lotsateetha Rice and Colin Powell, pushed into camera range at every opportunity. No doubt Dubya had the Handi Wipes at the ready for a quick scrub immediately afterwards.

A good friend forwarded the letter below, written by a Senegalese woman to an American counterpart at the UN. Our pal points out that even if only 10 percent of this is true, it’s appalling.

Dearest friends,

As you probably know, this week George Bush is visiting Africa. Starting with Senegal, he arrived this morning at 7:20 p.m. and left at 1:30 p.m. This visit has been such an ordeal that a petition is being circulated for this Tuesday, July 8 to be named Dependency Day. Let me share with you what we have been through since last week.

1. Arrestations: more than 1500 persons have been arrested and put in jail between Thursday and Monday. Hopefully, they will be released now that the Big Man is gone.

2. The US Army’s planes flying day and night over Dakar. The noise they make is so loud that one hardly sleeps at night.

3. About 700 security people from the US for Bush’s security in Senegal, with their dogs, and their cars. Senegalese security forces were not allowed to come near the US president.

4. All trees in places where Bush will pass have been cut. Some of them have more than 100 years.

5. All roads going downtown (where hospitals, businesses, schools are located) were closed from Monday night to Tuesday at 3 p.m. This means that we could not go to our offices or schools. Sick people were also obliged to stay at home.

6. National exams for high schools that started on Monday are postponed until Wednesday.

Bush’s visit to the Goree Island is another story. Goree is a small Island facing Dakar where, from the 15th to the 19th-century, the African slaves to be shipped to America were parked in special houses called slave houses. One of these houses has become a museum to remind humanity about this dark period and has been visited by kings, queens, presidents. Bill, Hillary, and Chelsea Clinton, and before them, Nelson Mandela, the pope, and many other distinguished guests or ordinary tourists visited it without bothering the islanders. But for "security reasons" this time, the local population was chased out of their houses from 5 to 12 a.m. They were forced by the American security to leave their houses and leave everything open, including their wardrobes, to be searched by special dogs brought from the US. The ferry that links the island to Dakar was stopped and offices and businesses closed for the day.

According to an economist interviewed by a private radio, Senegal is a very poor country and has lost huge amount of money in this visit, because workers have been prevented from walking out of their homes.

In addition to us being prevented to go out, other humiliating things happened. Not only did Bush not want to be with Senegalese, he did not want to use our things. He brought his own armchairs, and, of course, his own cars, and meals and drinks. He came with his own journalists and ours were forbidden inside the airport and in places he was visiting.

Our president was not allowed to make a speech. Only Bush spoke when he was in Goree. He spoke about slavery. It seems that he needs the vote of the African-Americans to be elected in the next elections, and wanted to please them. That’s why he visited Goree.

Several protest marches against American politics have been organized yesterday and even when Bush was here, but we think he does not care. We have the feeling that everything has been done to convince us that we are nothing, and that America can behave the way it wants, everywhere, even in our country.

Believe me friends, it is a terrible feeling. But according to a Ugandan friend of mine, I should not complain because in Uganda, one of the countries he is going to visit, Bush does not intend to go out of the airport. He will receive the Ugandan president in the airport lounge.

Nevertheless, I think I am lucky, because I have such wonderful American friends. But there are now thousands of Senegalese who believe that for all Americans, the world is their territory.

Love to you all.

Sleep tight, America.

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