THE MUSKETEER
Maybe the scene that best embodies The Musketeer, the millionth screen
adaptation of Alexandre Dumas's The Three Musketeers, is when d'Artagnan
(a colorless Justin Chambers) rides his horse until it collapses, whereupon he
reassures the steed, "I'll be back." In the case of this much-ridden project,
they should have just taken it behind the barn and shot it, because the attempt
to beat new life into an old chestnut with martial-arts high jinks from Xin-Xin
Xiong, the Chinese choreographer behind The Matrix and Crouching
Tiger, Hidden Dragon, merely adds to the confusion and the absurdity.
Blame, in part, director/cinematographer Peter Hyams's painterly compositions.
Re-creating the chiaroscuro of Dutch masters might do something for atmosphere,
but it doesn't help when you're trying to follow the flight lines of a dozen
flying swordsmen and assorted props. And if the action sequences are hard to
follow, forget about the plot complications of Dumas's tale of revenge,
political intrigue, love, and loyalty set in the court of feeble Louis XIII
(Daniel Mesguch) and the Machiavellian Cardinal Richelieu (Stephen Rea, looking
sharp in red). Adding spice is Tim Roth as Richelieu's gleeful henchman Febre,
though it's basically the same role he played in Rob Roy and Planet
of the Apes in different costumes. He, at least, seems to enjoy earning his
pay, unlike Mena Suvari in a superfluous turn as pre-feminist chambermaid and
love interest Constance, or Catherine Deneuve as Queen Anne. "This is fun!"
Anne says shortly after descending into a sewer, but there's no actor alive
who could make that line believable. At the Apple Valley, Entertainment,
Holiday, Hoyts Providence 16, Showcase, and Tri-Boro cinemas.
Issue Date: September 14 - 20, 2001
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